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What Is ‘Unicorning’ ?

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Unicorning, also known as “unicorn hunting,” is a term used to describe the search for a person who fits a specific set of desired traits and characteristics. In the context of relationships, a unicorn is a person who is willing to be part of a romantic relationship with a couple, typically a man and a woman, as a third partner. The term “unicorn” is often used to describe this person because they are seen as rare and hard to find, much like the mythical unicorn.

The concept of unicorning has gained popularity in recent years, particularly within the polyamorous community. Polyamory, also known as consensual non-monogamy, is a type of relationship in which individuals are able to have multiple romantic and/or sexual partners with the knowledge and consent of all involved. Unicorning is often seen as a way for couples to add an additional person to their relationship without disrupting the dynamic or causing jealousy.

However, the concept of unicorning has also been criticized for being selfish and dismissive of the needs and desires of the unicorn. Many argue that it puts the couple’s desires above those of the unicorn and can lead to the unicorn being treated as a sexual object rather than a valued member of the relationship.

What does it mean to be a Unicorn in a Relationship?

It typically means that the person is a bisexual woman who is interested in being part of a relationship with a heterosexual couple. However, the term can also be applied to people of any gender or sexual orientation who are willing to be part of a relationship with a couple.

In a unicorn relationship, the unicorn is typically expected to have a romantic and/or sexual relationship with both members of the couple. The couple may also expect the unicorn to be monogamous with them, meaning they will not pursue other romantic or sexual relationships outside of the couple.

Unicorns are often expected to be open-minded, unicorn sexually adventurous, and emotionally available. They may also be expected to be comfortable with the idea of non-monogamy and open to exploring new forms of relationships.

While the concept of unicorns may seem appealing to some, it is important to remember that it is not always easy or healthy. The unicorn may face challenges such as feeling left out or not being able to fully connect with one member of the couple. They may also struggle with feelings of jealousy or insecurity, as they may not receive the same level of attention and affection as the couple.

Additionally, the couple may struggle with feelings of jealousy or insecurity as they navigate the addition of a third person to their relationship.

It is also important to recognize that unicorn is not for everyone and that it is okay to say no to a request to be a unicorn. It is important to prioritize your own needs and desires and to only enter into a relationship if it feels comfortable and fulfilling for you.


Unicorning refers to the practice of seeking out and achieving the elusive, seemingly perfect solution to a problem or challenge. It involves a focus on innovation and creativity, as well as a willingness to take risks and think outside the box. While the pursuit of the perfect solution can be rewarding, it is important to also consider practicality and feasibility.

Ultimately, the concept of unicorning highlights the complexities and challenges that can arise in non-traditional relationships. It is important for all parties involved, to be honest, open, and respectful of each other’s needs and desires.

While unicorning may work for some, it is not a one-size-fits-all solution and it is important to find what works best for you and your relationships.

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